Whether and how much alimony (known as spousal maintenance in New York) is awarded to a divorcing spouse has nothing to do with gender – at least under the law. The key factors in alimony are largely financial — like the individual income, assets and earning potential of each spouse. New York no longer includes references to gender or gendered roles like husband and wife in the law.
Increasingly, women are earning at least as much, if not more, than their husbands. More men are choosing to be the stay-at-home parent in part for that reason. Therefore, more men are seeking and receiving alimony than decades ago. Further, more men are in same-sex marriages, where the stigma for seeking alimony may not seem as great if they divorce.
Some judges expect more from men seeking alimony
Unfortunately, men can still find it more difficult to get – and continue to receive – alimony than women. That’s just one reason why many men don’t seek it even if their soon-to-be ex is in a better financial position than they are.
The head of the Association of Matrimonial Lawyers told The New York Times that judges often approve less alimony for shorter durations for men than women. They’re also more likely to require that they become self-supporting sooner and to provide evidence that they’re looking for work or for a higher-paying job that is in line with their earning potential.
It’s critical that men who are seeking alimony as they divorce know their rights under the law and how to assert them. That’s especially true if they aren’t able to negotiate an agreement with their spouse and need to ask a judge to order spousal maintenance. That means being able to make a strong case in court. This is just one area of the divorce process wherein having experienced legal guidance can make a significant difference.