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How do you tell your child you are divorcing?

On Behalf of | Jul 30, 2020 | Firm News

New York parents like you have a lot going on when you consider divorce. You have to handle your own personal matters. On top of that you must deal with legal matters related to your child. This includes custody and support payment matters.

Beyond that, you also need to ensure that you take care of your child’s emotional and mental health. One of the best ways to do that is to break the news as well as you can.

Know what information to share

Psychology Today takes a look at ways to discuss divorce with your kids. They address one of the biggest mistakes first. This is not sharing enough information. You do not need to share everything with your child. In fact, you should keep some things from them. But you should tell the truth about your expectations for the future. Let them know who may move out of the house. Tell them what will likely stay the same, too. A big element of fear stems from the unknown. If you remove unknown elements, your child has less reason to feel anxious.

Work with your co-parent

Next, present a unified front with your co-parent. Do not argue with each other during the discussion. Do not go into the discussion on a tense note, either. Your kid will pick up on that. Discuss what you want to say beforehand. Go through a rehearsal run if you need to. Do not contradict each other.

Finally, emphasize that this is not your child’s fault. Children often internalize guilt over divorce. Reassure them that you will both always be here for them.